Up Down Up Down

It has been a roller coaster day in adoption land. First we get a call from Heather in INS and she tells us stuff is missing from our home study DOWN DOWN DOWN....then she tells me if we get it to her by Tues. then she will have it done by Wed. and our letter in the mail Thurs. UP UP UP! That letter is the last thing we need from our government to leave and get Ethan!

But we still have not heard if we have Rwandan approval...DOWN DOWN DOWN....and even if we do have approval the people who are helping us are busy so they may not be able to help us for another couple of weeks...BIG DOWN. So I spent the day in a weird funk. We still don't have a date to travel, or a baby for that matter. It's all very frustrating.

What I do have is the steadfast love of the Lord, who never leaves me. He knows my sadness and is already in control of my future. Sometimes I have to remind myself that this was God's idea in the first place. D and I were not sitting around pining for more children. He placed this burden on our hearts and has made it clear that His plans never fail if we just keep following. So even though I may feel like I am in the valley, I have no fear. Even though I have pain in my heart, I have an everlasting hope. This will happen, Ethan will come home, I will be a mommy of 3.

All in your time Lord. I will wait and be a light to those around me. Thank you Lord for loving me through my doubt and never letting go!